You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
