You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize