Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
