I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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