Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
