No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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