I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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