what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
