i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
