i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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