wat bout pragnant strippers??
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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