i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
