No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm bleeding and have questions
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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