you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
