The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
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