Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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