Porn is love you can see.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
