Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
