Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
