This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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