Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
