Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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