it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
