WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize