so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
