I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I got inside last night via doggy door
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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