Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
