i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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