Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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