One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
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