She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
