am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
