I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
