He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
ttyl tear gas
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
