I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
