i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
