I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
