Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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