i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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