He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
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He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
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He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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