Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
