Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
