you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
