ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize