it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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