I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
