just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
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No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
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We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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