My brain says no but my pants say off.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize