"it" just moved
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
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