reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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