She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
This is the high leading the old right now
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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